Albeit late in life, I am learning a very important lesson: Sometimes you have got to just let shit GO. Not every battle is meant to be fought. Not everything has to be….well a THING. Most of the shit that we hold on to doesn’t even belong to us. It’s OTHER PEOPLE’S SHIT. Just imagine for a moment if you will, looking at the previous sentence in a very LITERAL way. Holding on to other people’s shit. Like, what?? Why??
Human nature is to feel hurt when someone say something mean about you. Or to get pissed when someone does you dirty. Or to get sad when someone breaks your heart. Feeling those things is perfectly acceptable, and it is a great way to BEGIN the work of healing from our hurt. But it’s only a small step on the road to recovery. You’ve got to actually lay that burden DOWN. If you walk through life carrying every burden that someone else has given you(or that you’ve perceived that someone else has given you) your arms are going to get tired. Cause that shit is going to get heavy.
Today, I was angry. I allowed other people to hand me their shit and for a large part of my day, I held on to it. Eventually, something told me to be mindful of my feelings, and work out what was going on. So I listened. I listened to my body , and when I did I realized it was screaming at me to let that shit go ….in the form of hives around my neck and knots in my shoulders. I listened to my mind, which was so twisted up with anger it couldn’t focus on helping my 9-year-old son with his math homework. And as I listened and HEARD, I let that shit go. ALL OF IT.
Letting shit go doesn’t mean I am ignoring the problem. It means I am reconciling with the emotions so I am able to think clearly and come up with the solution to the problem vs wallowing in it. It doesn’t mean that there isn’t stress in that relationship, it means that you need to take a breath an analyze (be it friend, lover, family, co-worker) “does this serve me” if it does, how do you fix it? If it doesn’t ….. LET. THAT.SHIT.GO.
This practice takes work. It takes resilience. But it is necessary if you want to live your life to your fullest potential. At least that’s my truth.